It’s that time of year when SJ writers take a look at the games and events of 2014 and give out made-up and/or silly awards. It’s a yearly tradition going all the way back to the magazine days! Here are the 2014 Video Game Awards!

Sadly, 2014 was kind of an ugly year for video games. Several majorly hyped titles came out and were a disappointment, well at least critically. And then there was the ugliness of Gamersgate, where thoughtful debate was nuked and replaced by monkeys throwing feces at each other on the Internet. With three new consoles picking up steam, this was supposed to be a great year, but it was not. Still, we had some solid sequels, a few surprise hits and lots of great indie games. Overall, I’d say Sony is still on top, but Xbox is getting some traction. Meanwhile, Nintendo is still the company that prints money, but now in the form of little plastic toys. At least there’s nowhere to go but up for 2015!

The "Someone’s Leaving Banana Peels Everywhere" Award
Ubisoft

Far Cry 3 was my favorite game of 2012. It had a great tropical setting combined with an engaging story about an empty-headed party bro who becomes a real person through combat and hardship. Assassin’s Creed IV: Black Flag was also amazing. Not storywise, but when you combined the cool atmosphere, unique setting and enjoyable gameplay, there was quite a bit of pirate fun to be had. Seemed like Ubisoft could do no wrong. And then someone there started leaving banana peels everywhere and the whole company started slipping. Assassin’s Creed Unity was so bug-ridden and broken, the company actually apologized. And Far Cry 4, while competently made, lacked the interesting story and "magic” of its predecessor. Personally, I think 2014 was just an off year for them, and we’ll see a newer, smarter Ubisoft in 2015. Let’s hope!

Urian Brown

The Not-So-Great Debate
Gamergate Controversy

Gamergate made just about everyone feel icky. Feminists didn’t seem happy about it. Non-feminists didn’t seem happy about it. Regular gamers really weren’t happy having their name associated with sexist maniacs who issue death threats. It just wasn't good for anyone...or was it? It was good for Anita Sarkeesian. She was on the Colbert Report! There’s no doubt about it, she is one smart lady. I don’t always agree with her, but she has some good points and definitely knows how to further her name. It was good for gaming websites, too. Talk about the ultimate click bait! But in the end, it finally seems like it’s fizzling out like these things do. There were valid points on both sides of the argument, but it was hard to hear them amongst all the screaming.

Urian Brown

Best Use of Gardening Tools
Shovel Knight

Shovel Knight stands as a perfect homage to retro gaming, utilizing a multitude of influences from the NES era such as Mega Man, Duck Tales, and more—all packed into a fun little package. The best part of it all? Your primary weapon is a shovel. Not just any shovel, but one that can pierce armor, knock back fireballs, dig up treasure, open up hidden passages and more. Truly the classiest of weapons for an aspiring knight. For shovelry!

Michael Revis

The “What a Long and Strange Trip It's Been” Award
Akiba's Trip: Undead and Undressed 

Akiba's Trip is officially the craziest video game I have ever played. It's also hella fun. To recap, you play as an otaku living in Akihabara who unwittingly becomes a vampire and has to fight other vampires by stripping their clothes off, thereby exposing them to sunlight. While Akiba's Trip plays like a 3D River City Ransom, the concept is nutty enough to give this brawler some novelty. If that's not enough to make you want to try it, you can strike JoJo poses when ripping some dude's pants off. There's also cute girls you can social link with if you're into that sort of thing, and it also affects the plot, giving it replay value in addition to all the weapon and clothing combinations available. It's out on all current PlayStation platforms, with a PC version coming later this year. If you want to have some good ol' fashioned mindless fun and live out your nerd fantasies in virtual Akihabara, then you owe it to yourself to try out Akiba's Trip. Just don't reenact the game in real life unless you want a one-way trip to an Akihabara jail! 

Ray n. 

The Hypest Hype You Will Ever Hype During the Hypening
Bayonetta 2

Everyone’s favorite witch returns in grand fashion, and the gaming world has responded kindly. What else is there to say about this game that hasn’t been said already? It looks great, plays great, improves on the foundation of the first title and has some of the most insane boss battles you’ll ever see. It’s simply a must have for any Wii U owner or anyone that’s a fan of character action games. To think that there was a possibility that such a wondrous gem wouldn’t even exist if Nintendo hadn’t stepped in to help Platinum Games when they needed it the most. Thank you, Nintendo! 

Michael Revis

The "Special Recognition for Going Above and Beyond the Dreams of Otaku" Award
Bandai Namco

These guys are on fire! Game after game—they’re making otaku’s dreams come true! They’ve done the seemingly impossible and announced the upcoming release of J-Stars Victory VS+! A game that no one ever thought would see the light of day in the States due to the complex licensing issues. They’ve also announced One Piece: Pirate Warriors 3. And they have plans to release the new Naruto Shippuden and Dragon Ball Z games in 2015! They had a busy 2014 as well! They released a Dragon Ball Z game, a Naruto Shippuden game, a JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure game,and not one, but two One Piece games! They have become the source for anime-based video games. Hats off to you, Bandai Namco! Oh, and they’re also going to release a Godzilla game this year. GODZILLA!!!

Urian Brown

Best Retro Revival of 2014
SEGA 3D Classics Series 

Sega has commissioned developer M2 to port some of their best classic arcade and Genesis games to the Nintendo 3DS, and they're among the best ports I've ever played. Games like Space Harrier, Sonic the Hedgehog, and Hang-On are faithfully recreated to run just like their original arcade counterparts, right down to their optional cabinet bezels. With nice 3D effects (especially in Galaxy Force II), lots of alternate modes of play and portability, these are the definitive versions of Sega's hits, although Altered Beast is still pretty weak.

by Ray n. 

Worst Attempt to Honor Sylvester Stallone
Rambo: The Video Game

Sometimes you get an idea that sounds great on paper. A video game based on one of the most iconic action movie franchises of all time with Sylvester Stallone in his prime? Sounds impossible to screw up. Except, someone did. And thus, Rambo: The Video Game was made with a non-existent budget, zero testing and most baffling, the decision to make it a lightgun game with no actual lightgun support. Everything that they could do wrong, they managed to do, which is amazing in a sense. You’ll get better enjoyment out of watching the actual Rambo movies than playing this game.

Michael Revis

The "Surprisingly Passes the Bechdel Test" Award
Senran Kagura Shinovi Versus 

Senran Kagura is one racy video game series. With three games released here (and two more in Japan), Senran Kagura is known for boobies, butts and butt-kicking. If one decides to actually play a Senran Kagura game, then they'll learn that the gameplay is fun and that the storyline is surprisingly deep. Every girl has their own personality and quirks and they all have their own motivations for becoming ninja. They also play differently in the games, with each having their own special moves that can be mastered. Like, I even cried at some points of the story due to some of the girls' dark pasts. And what's really cool is that none of the girls are dependent on any male figure. They hardly talk about men at all; in fact, much of that talk is in reference to their teachers. Instead, they're independent warriors who overcome their past trials and risk their lives to fight for their ideals. I've seen folks call the series “shallow” and “perverted,” but I assure you it's anything but shallow. However, I will concede that it's indeed perverted.

by Ray n. 

The "Go Towards the Light" Award
Child of Light

Although Ubisoft had a hard time with some of their major releases, they did a great job on the smaller-scale stuff. Child of Light is my favorite RPG of 2014 and the most beautiful game I played all year. Every level is like a finely illustrated storybook come to life. And it's not just another pretty face, it has a great battle system. It's basically a simplified version of the Grandia system, which I believe to be the best RPG combat system of all time. While the story was light, it matched the visuals perfectly and the whole experience was incredibly charming. This was a brilliant gem that shone brightly in an somewhat dreary year for releases. 

by Urian Brown

That wraps up Part 1 of the awards! Hope you enjoyed it! Part 2 will go up tomorrow!